Saturday, July 25, 2009

She Works Hard for the Money

Do you remember that song Donna Summer used to sing, "She Works Hard for the Money?" I kept thinking of that song all day today as I put in my eight hours at work. This job is incredibly tedious for me. I can tolerate six-hour shifts but the eight-hour ones just kill me! So boring and relentless just ringing customer's purchases up - that is all I do. Stand in place and ring up items, remove sensor tags, take money and count change or return credit card receipts. There are only small moments of respite where I can talk a moment or two with another cashier. By the end of eight hours I am about ready to explode form boredom, the repetition and monotony. To top it off both the management and customers sometimes treat the employees as beneath them.

I will be so ready to get out there this fall to pursue a "real job" in my field. I am worried about handling even this minimal job plus get my house ready for the closing and move on August 25th. Next week I am scheduled for 40 hours (five eight hour days - I am going to die!). I think I may have to ask for a week off. I still have to clean out/clear out the garage and get rid of all the excess in my home.

They say moving is one of the most stressful situations a person can go through. Let's make that 10 times worse when you're doing it on your own as a widowed, working Mom!!!

Today when I got to work at noon I found out that they had changed the schedule without informing me. So instead of working noon til 8:30, they had me down for 2 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. They wanted me to leave the store and come back an hour later but that seemed pretty silly to me plus a waste of gas. I stood my ground (since it was their error) and said I wanted to work my original hours and that is what I did. At this point I actually don't care how much longer I work - if they fire me I wouldn't really mind. There is so much on my plate to worry about, figure out and handle it might even be a blessing to not have to work right now.

I truly can only do so much on my own - no one is rallying to lend a hand or even minimal emotional support. Everything that will need to be accomplished will have to get done by me. Like I referenced at the beginning of this post, "She Works Hard for the Money," but now I'll change it to "I Work Hard for the Money!"

Today I am grateful:

1. For the crescent moon I saw in the evening sky as I drove home from work.
2. For the billowing blue clouds and dark blue sky I could see from the store's big front windows as I worked today.
3. For the continued cooler weather - this summer has been blessedly less hot than others in the recent past.
4. That the boys had a good baseball season - they did well and so did their team - it was very enjoyable.
5. That despite all the hardship surrounding our life the boys have continued to have a good summer with friends, going to the city, Great America and having soccer and volleyball camps in addition to the baseball.

1 comment:

  1. i'm still here reading your words and thinking of you. keep venting to get it out. know that someday, somehow, the large circle you are trudging in will come back around your way. it will for all of us - somehow. i hope. be good to yourself. bubble bath. just a small moment at some point where you can sit and close your eyes and feel yourself breathe.

    i'm sorry for your lack of someone to go to, for daily support, a live person who is a sounding board. i know that feeling of helplessness. i am rowing that same swamped little boat over here. pull in the oars for a moment and sit quietly. listen to your boys in the other room. you can do this. it's what i tell myself every morning. "get up. you can do this."

    as always, i'm here.