Monday, February 7, 2011


As much fun and joy this picture depicts of snow, I am finding myself sick of the cold and winter. About this time of year I start to feel more vulnerable. I think part of it is related to the weather and the constant concern over winter driving and adverse weather conditions. I also just found out that although my sons will be eligible for health insurance from our state (I still have to pay a premium), I am no longer eligible and I am worried sick about being able to find affordable coverage between now and the end of the month.

I keep thinking of Obama's State of the Union Address when he talked about health care. I didn't know I was being cut from my coverage at that time and now that I am aware, I have become one of those citizens facing what is in my opinion one of the worst issues plaguing our country right now - not having affordable health care available to everyone who wants/needs it.

Just another hardship to try and figure out and deal with and quite frankly along with the weather I am sick and tired of coping with all of life alone. I have come to believe that it is nearly impossible for some of us to survive on our own (one salary) and that is part of the reason I am so eager for remarriage. Not only do I want to share life with a partner for romance and companionship, but it seems to be an almost economic necessity to exist in our society right now. Marriage would improve my economic/financial life as sad as a reason as that is to get married. But I'm trying to be practical here and realistic.

Anyway, that is what has been on my mind of late - more worry and hating the snow. The one bright spot is going to hear my son in a dress rehearsal concert for show choir tonight and he has a solo. It is tough going back out into the cold, dark night but at least the auditorium will be warm and alive with the spirit and energy of young people, much like those depicted in the snow picture above! I'm hoping some of that liveliness rubs off on me!


Although it was snowing when I left for the concert and I groaned a loud GROAN because it snowed yesterday too and I am so tired of scraping off the vehicles, it was worth attending. Couldn't believe how these kids get through a nonstop performance of 25 minutes singing and dancing to 6 songs with costume changes during! My son's solo was amazing. His band director was at the concert and congratulated him after. He said he wanted to speak to my son about college sometime this week. Then the director and I walked down the hallway together while my son got his costume and helped clear the stage. I related a little about the state talent contest, mentioning that my son had composed and performed a new song. I said I'm not sure where to go with promoting/supporting my son because it seems as though his work is becoming more complex and sophisticated. The band director agreed. When I added that my son seems to have something special, he agreed with that too. That is what he wants to also address with my son - where he can go from here.

The past few weeks my son has been complaining that he joined the group - the dance routines are fast-paced and difficult. He is working a lot of hours on the weekends and this is another responsibility. I was in show choir for two years in college and loved it. Seeing my son perform tonight I was reassured that it is a good activity for him to be involved in. Despite his complaints, he is one of the strongest dancers in the group and I feel that being in this group rounds out his musical experience. He plays guitar, is the section leader on sax for the top band, composes the music and lyrics to his own songs - he has not yet performed in a choir so this is good experience, as well as all the dancing.

I stopped at Starbucks on the way home to treat my son to a coffee drink. We were given a gift card from Sam and on Sunday I treated my youngest to a strawberry drink. I got a box of Joy tea which is a rarity since it is usually sold out by now. So Sam's gift treated us all. I noticed a bunch of sandwiches on the counter and remarked how good they looked. The manager told me they were free for the taking since they were going out of code soon. I told him my sons would be thrilled with a $5.75 sandwich for their lunches tomorrow and ended up with 4 sandwiches and a yogurt parfait, which I'll snag.

So the evening ended up turning out to be a big success despite the falling snow. After our latest blizzard anything is tolerable so I imagine that we'll make it through the rest of the season okay having survived such a bad storm last week!


  1. I wish you all the best with your son's singing. My son's vocal talent paid for 9 years of private school (worth $100k), and he currently holds a small scholarship as a cantor at church while he studies classical singing at uni.
    Having said that, it is a tough gig to aim for as a career, but as my son has some learning difficulties, it is probably the only way he could have gone to university, by studying music.
    Much love
    Julie (from southern Australia, you think you have weather over there, you should see us here, we had terrible storms on the weekend which were the leftovers from a cyclone in Queensland 1000s of km away!)

  2. Thank you for checking in. I have often thought of you during this weather and wondering what it is like down under. I know music in general is a very tough gig and he has a backup plan to work as a juvenile probation officer. So he'll study both in college. But I think it is okay for us to push the button a bit and see where this may go, such as posting him on YouTube and so on. Why not, I ask? Let's go for it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that. I'll keep everyone posted.

  3. You were thinking of me? Oh what a sweetie. We have had to talk about plan B and C and even down to D when he was undergoing chemo last year, which could have damaged his lungs and hearing, devastating to anyone, but a singer, sheesh. Me being a very risk averse person it has taken me a long time to come to grips with this career goal, however, someone has to do it, right? It might as well be my boy. I also think that now with everything that has happened to him he has a great 'back story', which seems to be important (see Susan Boyle). The added advantage is that where he is studying seems to be 'classical music central', everyone knows everyone and when opportunities come up, he has a chance to be involved.
    Anyway, I had to laugh about your pictures of 'we have melt', never seen that before in my life, but we have plenty of flooding here, its just not cold enough for snow.
    Love Julie

  4. Julie - I think when you've undergone loss/life - death situations you lose some of that risk aversion. I usually say what the heck to life at this point. I too have thought, why not my boy? It's going to end up being someone's in the end, why not mine? I know you have gone through so much medical/health related with your son and it is wonderful he is where he is at and what he has already accomplished. My son has a story to tell too and it comes out in the words to his songs. Like you said, a good back story. He'd be a good performer to do a background story on for America Idol. I hope maybe he will serve as inspiration to others and touch lives positively however this ends up and wherever he goes. Susan Boyle is a huge talent and inspiration for us all. Right now all I can say is at least I don't live in Alaska! Take care.