Monday, January 31, 2011

Janurary Goodbye
















This weekend, it was finally warm enough to take a wintry walk in my beloved little forest preserve. But now we're back to a winter blizzard warning to hit Tue.-Wed. I am surprised at how quickly the month of January went by. And for that I am grateful. January has long been my most dreaded month what with the cold and snow. The bed is extra large and lonely. It is dark early and dark upon awakening. It is the month that the pain of widowhood hits me harder, the month I feel most drained, discouraged and down. I hate the extra worry and anxiety about driving in wintry weather and now have to worry about teens driving too on icy covered roads. Although I love knitting scarves, I don't much like having to always bundle up. Winter adds too much to my already full plate and with the arrival of spring, there is such relief in having to "carry" less around. This is the season when I so much miss a partner available to help clean off the cars or run out in the snow for the needed milk...

I am aware that the month went by more quickly on account of my father's death and my son's involvement with the state talent contest. Maybe those were small blessings in disguise - despite the stress, those distractions that helped me focus on other things besides widowhood, January, winter and the blasted cold weather.

There is a sense of relief in closing the door on January and opening it into February, even though it is coming charging in and may be the biggest storm in the past decade. I made it through the cruelest month!

4 comments:

  1. Goodbye January, Hello Feblovery! The month of couples, love and everything! Thanks it was a nice blog!

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  2. Congratulations on surviving the month! February has been a turning point for a long time: in Celtic countries, people celebrated Imbolc, when winter's back was broken, at the beginning of February, and then the Christian church co-opted that and turned it into Candlemas (also St. Brigid's Day) to celebrate essentially the same thing. You are connected to people going back hundreds and thousands of years who felt exactly the same way you do about the snow and wished for spring to come, which is really kind of cool!

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  3. January seemed to fly by whether we were having "fun" or not!!! :/ I am glad you made it through and a new month begins. I am thinking about you as I hear about the "monster" storm coming through your neck of the woods. Praying you will be kept safe and WARM.

    Much love!!!!

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  4. Reverse Address Lookup? - I think it is cute that you referred to Feb. as Feblovery but Feb. can still be a tough month for widows/ers around Valentine's Day when we are assaulted by all the images of couples and love and greatly mourn our lost loves.

    Vanessa - Very interesting info. I enjoyed hearing it and thank you for sharing it. You wouldn't happen to have read Edith Wharton's "The House of Mirth?" I'm just wondering the significance of the title and figure of all people I know you might be one who has read the book!

    Beth - Thanks for thinking of us in the Midwest. I often wonder what it is like to live where you live. We visited the Outer Banks (one of the last vacations I took with the boys and my husband) and would have to say I loved N.C.!

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