I had a migrane today when I woke up and I realized I had been dreaming about my soon-to-be ex-husband, which I have been doing with increased frequency. I remembered that what I had been dreaming about were the "what ifs" and lost chances, how much I was at fault, etc. That was all certainly a downer and depressing. Then it was snowing quite a bit and I got to worrying about what will happen next winter when I have a job. What if the weather is snowy and lousy and I am afraid to drive because if I get in an accident I will not be able to replace the van. I was caught frantically between the past and the future, ironically, neither of which exist! My emotions were heightened and I was becoming agitated with fear. But really over what since the dimensions of past and future aren't actual? The only time that is real is the present.
Back in November when I was struggling with all of this I purchased a bracelet from the Signals catalog bearing this inscription: "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment - Buddha." I was finding that if I could remain focused on the day or time at hand I was much less likely to become freaked out and scared. I wanted to wear the bracelet to help me stay focused on this. I also began to wear inexensive affirmation jewelry such as bracelets with the peace sign and some rings with healing crystals. Anything that could help me stay focused on what I can control and not what is out of my complete jurisdiction because it doesn't exist!
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