Saturday, October 15, 2011

What Happens to the Widows?

I was thinking today of the widows who used to blog but have not done so in numerous months. It makes me wonder what happened to them and how they are doing. One was a woman my age, widowed for about the same amount of time with her son off to college. Did she start a business or go back to school? Have others become more used to their situations or met someone and become so busy they don't have the interest or need to blog anymore?

Would I even continue blogging if I was going out or had a fuller career right now? I'm not sure I would. Some of my blogging comes from the amount of free time I have when I'm home alone. I hope that all changes when I go back to school and have to write papers and study.

I am moving into a new era of my life, thankfully. But I'm not there yet. A few more months to go... Until that time I will blog about widowhood as I see and experience it. And I hope to find out what happened to the other widows because it is important to hear their voices and gain from their growth, experience and perspectives.


  1. Good Morning,

    I found your blog on blogcatalog.

    It was 3 1/2 years ago my husband suddenly died at 45 yrs old. I started blogging in January and have had such a blast.

    I too am on a new path after being laid off 2 1/2 yrs ago. There have been times where I came close to landing a new job but as they say "close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades."

    Best Wishes to you and your family.


  2. I have often wondered what happened to people who's blog I read everyday. They were there--then--poof--nothing for months on end. I guess they just have resolved the feelings they had and wrote about and now no longer need a sounding board. You are doing so well--taking the next steps needed for a better life. It has been a difficult journey for you and I certainly hope, the new path you are starting on will bring a much better life to you.

  3. I think it depends whether you're blogging about a specific incident or transition in your life, or blogging because writing is how you express yourself in general. I've been keeping some sort of journal since I was 15 for exactly the latter reason, so I probably always will--although I do go through phases of writing more or less depending on how busy I am, or whether there's anything unusual going on.

    (I would miss reading your thoughts if you stopped blogging, but if it were because you were happier, I'd be happy for you!)

  4. Widow, I responded a few times, my son is in college this year (he wanted a tattoo but didn't get one) and my daughter is a Jr. in hs I had to take over the family business when my husband died. So the kids lost their Dad and their stay at home Mom. Then the bad economy hit and my business has really suffered. I had to lay off my employees and downsize. I am surviving, but it is tough. The worries about getting the kids through college is on my shoulders and mine alone. I am lucky, we had assets, so I am in my house but there is not money for extras. With so many in the same position I am not complaining

  5. Not specifically widow bloggers, but any bloggers that have had a ragingly popular blog and have went MIA, peak my curiosity. I wonder if they don't have time, if there has been some unforeseen tragedy, if they've "gotten a life." Usually if I'm not writing it's linked to laziness or the inability to talk, because sometimes I just don't give a (pick rotten word of your choice. What really peaks my interest is seemingly abandoned graves at the cemetery where my husband was laid to rest. I try not to judge because I don't know the family situation, but it breaks my heart. I'm one of those widows who has to tend to her husbands grave often, change out the flowers, leave little mementos etc. And here it's only 7 months and 11 days later...I wonder if I'll spend the rest of my life this way?

  6. Michele - Thanks for commenting and good luck with the job search to you as well.

    Judy - Good to hear from you, I hope all is going well. Thank you for your kind words.

    Vanessa - I started a diary when I was in third grade and kept it up through adulthood. I found it easier to blog than write in a journal and have much preferred blogging - and it makes me look more up-to-date than I am with my sons. I too, enjoy your thoughts on life!

    Leslie - My 18-year-old just got his tattoo to honor his Dad - I'll do a post on that soon. Thank you for sharing a bit about your life. There is a woman my age at work with two kids in college and it is so nice to talk to her and share similar worries. I told her the other day that I was down to $75.00 in my checking acct. She beat me by admitting she was down to $9.00. it is tough for so many. I try to be positive by telling myself that we have a roof over our heads.

    Amber - It is very dear of you to keep up your husband's grave. My husband's grave is out of state and I miss having a place to put flowers, photos and such. Maybe those people who stop are those who can't or have moved away. I know so many people are so busy right now and scrambling because of the economy. All the best to you.