Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Black Thursday

This year some stores will be open on Thanksgiving. What in the world needs to be purchased at Michael's craft store that couldn't wait until Black Friday? Really, someone is going to leave their family and the holiday celebration to go out to a Michael's? And what about the employees who have to work that shift?

I see the madness of consumerism and get depressed. It is hard to be an observer when you can't be a participant. I watch the t.v. commercials and everyone in them is smiling and happy. Now I know that they are actors in commercials but a part of me starts feeling bad because I don't look like these happy moms in the commercials gearing up to hit the Target 2-day sale.

Now what would really inspire me and actually make me happy would be a realistic portrayal of a real single/only mom worried about getting her kids a few Christmas gifts and how to pay the electric bill at the same time. It would portray a normal looking woman hunched over a kitchen table flipping through her pile of bills and looking forlornly at her checkbook...

Oh, and can there please be a ban on those Lexus commercials where people actually get a $50,000 vehicle for their Christmas gift! I know I should just laugh at the ridiculousness of these ads but they still make me sad...


  1. Last time I went to Target during the 2-day sale, no one looked smiling and happy - they looked ready to run each other over with their carts to get to the $10 toasters. Hardly the Christmas spirit!

  2. I agree, it is very difficult to watch those commercials. Why not a realistic commerical of a lonely widow staring out the window while she is eating tuna salad? Those carefully orchestrated commercials are much like the rest of society - no thought is given to the "have nots" - to those who once knew what is what like to be loved, had family, friend, neighbor; those long since abandoned through the reproach of widowhood and whose financial stability met its demise. They, whether they are Madison Avenue exec's advertising their goods or the person next door, "they" are quite comfortable having completely put us out of their minds and hearts, whether it be Thanksgiving or any other Thursday.

    This year will be my 4th holiday season as a widow (no children)...there will be no turkey dinners, no holiday festivities, no invitations from anyone to "join us and share our plenty". Thanksgiving through Christmas are always more difficult, but this one especially so for me. The one person who called themselves friend, who promised they would never ever do anything to hurt me because they knew how many painful things I've been through, whom I trusted and believed actually cared...betrayed the trust. The pain of deception adds sorrow upon sorrow...it has shattered me.

    My hope and prayer is that we may all find peace, comfort and hope every single day, but especially throughout these holidays when we are subjected, in one form or another, to painful reminders of our loss(es).

  3. Vanessa - I have to say that your description is pretty funny. I haven't been to any holiday sales in years and maybe it is better that I've missed them!

    Anonymous - Your words touched me and I am truly saddened to know that there is a kindred spirit out there on their own this Thursday. I agree with you that widows can be shut out, ignored and forgotten, even ones with family. My heart goes out to you and all of us feeling our losses, which I do think dig deeper at this time of year.

  4. I used to work on Madison Ave creating commercials for products and services. After fifteen years I left in search of the good life, that is, the soul filled life. Perhaps most people want easy answers, simple solutions, a chance to come out on top in some way. I did, at a younger age.

    When I left, I asked simply to learn to love well. Life has obliged, or should I say, is obliging. I encountered the 'dark night of the soul', and with nothing but desperate hope in the face of searing pain, chose 'Life'. I guess I climbed out of that pit, because as death hovered about me in my husband's last months, I was able to celebrate life - his, mine, family's.

    I no longer ask to be happy, or to get that bigger whatever. I ask to love well.
    You, WiTM, can love well, are loving well, and will continue to choose this path. Forget those silly commercials. They're smoke and mirrors. That Lexus will never fill a void in someone's soul the way love can.

  5. Thanks Flo for your always interesting and relevant comments. I am noticing a trend toward some meanness in commercials, e.g., making fun of Santa, mean middle-aged women shoppers telling off teenaged clerks, etc. I don't like this trend at all. So all of those can join the Lexus ones.

  6. Getting ready for my first Thanksgiving without Tom who died in Feb this year. I want to be outgoing and join our extended family in the holiday for our 8 yr old son's sake. I just don't know if I can fake the smile and show up. I know he deserves to go and the family wants us there...I feel pressured to do it...uhhhgg...dreading it horribly.