tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post309254628622093790..comments2024-03-06T03:23:51.904-08:00Comments on Surviving Middle-Aged Widowhood: Winter BluesWidow in the Middlehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01598249263166943162noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-65804265389724244442010-01-15T06:59:15.974-08:002010-01-15T06:59:15.974-08:00When Ralph and I got married, his son was 3, mine ...When Ralph and I got married, his son was 3, mine was 5 and my daughter was 8. Easier than teenagers, I'm sure.thelmazhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09819557846762852247noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-42140738132971075282010-01-14T19:20:23.003-08:002010-01-14T19:20:23.003-08:00Email me sometime. I will tell you more about it.Email me sometime. I will tell you more about it.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08967278323581039367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-57275219074125687892010-01-14T18:52:57.289-08:002010-01-14T18:52:57.289-08:00Kelly - I like your inspirational view of still ha...Kelly - I like your inspirational view of still having a relationship with Joe. I've never had that perspective and find it very refreshing and a new way of thinking for me.Widow in the Middlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01598249263166943162noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-30499982313718685672010-01-14T16:26:48.921-08:002010-01-14T16:26:48.921-08:00I like to think of myself as still having a relati...I like to think of myself as still having a relationship with Joe. Just a different kind of relationship. A spiritual one. But the physical relationship, having him there to hold me at night, to hug me when I need it is the part I will NEVER get over missing.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08967278323581039367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-56448667210550583802010-01-14T16:21:28.911-08:002010-01-14T16:21:28.911-08:00Thelma - It is wonderful to know of a successful a...Thelma - It is wonderful to know of a successful and loving second marriage. I really wish that for everyone who is seeking it. I just know in my situation that being widowed with sons the ages of mine has not been conducive to marriage because it would involve relocation. And after the losses we've faced, moving out-of-state is hard to contemplate. Can I ask how old all the children were when you got remarried? And did you have to relocate or were you able to remain in the same area? Thanks for providing proof that great happiness is possible to have again!<br /><br />Boo - I'm wondering if the extreme missing of the physical qualities has to do with it being winter and cold, etc. Just a thought that there might be a connection.<br /><br />Kelly - That is the sweetest comment from your youngest! But don't I know that all of his sincere intentions do not make up for the lack of your husband being with you now and in the future.Widow in the Middlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01598249263166943162noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-49048576702271747452010-01-14T15:34:08.488-08:002010-01-14T15:34:08.488-08:00Right there with you guys. The loneliness and deaf...Right there with you guys. The loneliness and deafening quiet are sometimes too much to bear. Unless I have the kids with me, for the most part I am completely alone. I have gotten sick a couple times and it dawned on me that I could succumb and it would be days before anyone found me. As far as getting hurt etc. you are so right. Who the hell is going to take care of me? I jokingly made a comment about a nursing home and my sweet youngest said "No way I will ever put you in a home. I will always take care of you!". He is his father's son. The problem is I don't want my kids taking care of me I want my husband here with me. I'm hating on Mick Jagger right about now.Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08967278323581039367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-25169158755043646742010-01-14T13:02:07.009-08:002010-01-14T13:02:07.009-08:00I completely identify with what you are saying. I...I completely identify with what you are saying. I so miss the physical presence these days, the physical touch, smelling a man, the whole thing. Bleeurghhh, this sucks.Boohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10695496303699631884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-738048378012755564.post-28241749832631385042010-01-14T11:48:49.653-08:002010-01-14T11:48:49.653-08:00I disagree with not marrying until your kids are g...I disagree with not marrying until your kids are grown. I married after a divorce, we combined our families (one son--his; son and daughter--mine) and called ourselves The Brady Bunch. We would have celebrated our 35th anniversary a couple of months after my husband died. He was great with my kids and they were very devoted to him. At the funeral, my son read a beautiful letter he'd written, saying "We alsways called you Ralphn but we thought of you as our dad."<br />What if I'd waited until the kids grew up? I'd have missed a lot of happiness.thelmazhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09819557846762852247noreply@blogger.com